Out of all that happened this past week, three things stand out: 1) I had to take my car into the repair shop for the nth time this month, due to the inadvisability of driving with the engine light on, 2) My husband and I watched a gorgeous sunset (from our kayaks) across a beautiful little private lake during our annual fall weekend getaway, and 3) I painfully endured a series of excruciating migraines, aching joints, and an agonizing tooth infection.
Do you see the order in which I wrote that account? Bad,
good, bad. Now try and remember what those three things were. It’s easy to
focus on the bad, when it’s at both the beginning and end of the story, isn’t it?
In fact, it’s tempting to just ignore the middle all together. When you look at
it that way, it’s easy to sum up my week as pretty icky. Yes, there was that
sunset, but hey, the majority of it was spent feeling physically wrecked and
emotionally wrung out.
Unfortunately, the above is often how I see my
circumstances. It is so easy to get bogged down in all of life’s low moments,
especially when they are numerous or extreme, that I can easily skim over the
good parts of my days and weeks. Pretty soon, if I’m not careful to check my
attitude, my life can look and feel pretty bleak.
At the same time as I was experiencing all of this, I read
the sad account of a beautiful 29-year-old with cancer who took her own life
under Oregon’s “Die with Dignity” law. While I understood her pain as she
suffered from massive headaches and seizures (I have had both), what I didn’t understand
was her timing. Just two days beforehand, she had said she was postponing her
planned overdose, because she was experiencing so much joy with her friends and
family. Truthfully, I was shocked when I heard on the news that she was dead. “What
happened???” I thought to myself. How could she be so happy to be alive one
day, only to take her own life shortly thereafter?
As I reflected on this question, the answer became clear. More
importantly, the answer became pertinent to my own life. It’s very simple. Life
is like an Oreo sandwich cookie: brown and crunchy on the outside, with some
awesomely yummy vanilla frosting on the inside. Sadly, that young woman just
ate hers the wrong way.
If you grew up in the
United States and saw the Oreo commercials, you know that the “proper” (and
best) way to eat an Oreo is to pull the two cookies apart, lick the delicious
icing first, and then consume the crunchy pieces that are left. Even better,
dip them in milk so that the cookies will soften a bit too. YUM!
If you’ve ever tried eating an Oreo in the same way as you
would a different kind of cookie, you’ll know it’s just not the same. When you
bite through both cookies at once, it’s easy to miss the taste of the best part
– the icing – all together. And yet, that’s how we often go through life, isn’t
it? We look at our overall “Oreo” called life, and it looks very crunchy. We
think about how hard and painful it can be, especially if we take the experiences
of our past and project them onto our future; and the prospect of enjoying it
just doesn’t seem very good, much less “delightful.” This is especially true for
those of us struggling with chronic pain, which can suck the life out of our
daily activities, either incapacitating us all together or just hampering our
efforts to live normally by making even the simplest tasks so very, very difficult.
What I realized over the weekend getaway with Ben, which
began with a morning migraine and ended with an aching tooth, was that the key
to enjoying – and valuing – life on life’s terms (which can be messy, even for
those without serious problems) is to really, really, REALLY enjoy the beautiful
moments sandwiched in between the painful parts. If I can just approach the “Oreo” of my life the right way, focused on
the delicious experience of “licking the icing” from the middle, my whole
perspective changes. It tastes so good that I can better deal with the “crunchy”
bits and realize that even when life is hard, the good times are worth enduring
the bad.
My father, who endured Stage IV cancer for two years, knew what it was
to approach life that way. Although he was in extreme pain much of the time, he
held onto and enjoyed every morsel of goodness he could find in his life,
despite his circumstances. He held out for the icing! And in the end, I know he
was grateful for each one of those delicious moments “in between.”
I saw a Facebook post this week from a fellow RA blogger who
clearly knows how to focus on the “filling” of her Oreo sandwich cookie life.
She posted that she had taken some time to spend with friends that day and then
had to come home to take her (pain) meds and was resting. Her thought on the
day? “Worth it! J”
How do you look at the
“Oreo” of your life? Do you try and take it all in with one bite and feel “crunched”?
Or do you take the time to enjoy licking the yummy icing in the middle?
Licking the (Yummy) Filling of an Oreo Sandwich Cookie originally appeared on Spring Sight blog, by Linda W. Perkins. Get even more encouragement by following me on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.
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Licking the (Yummy) Filling of an Oreo Sandwich Cookie originally appeared on Spring Sight blog, by Linda W. Perkins. Get even more encouragement by following me on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.
Subscribe to Spring Sight by Email Your privacy is very important. Your email address will not be shared with any 3rd parties.
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