Showing posts with label diagnosis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label diagnosis. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Familial Guilt: Is It My Fault? Is It Theirs?

"Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?" – John 9:2

I received a call from a dear family friend the other day. I hadn’t heard from her in a while and she needed to talk. After we got through a few minutes of small talk, she said she had to share something important with me: her teenage daughter had been diagnosed with glaucoma.

It began with a straightforward statement and explanation of the doctor’s finding. But then, mid-sentence, she broke down in tears.

“I feel so awful!” she cried. “The doctor says it’s genetic. It’s my fault!”

I listened as my sweet friend poured out her heart to me, so broken that her own genetic makeup – including several chronic illnesses – had been passed down to the next generation.
Familial guilt is all too common…and all too painful.
Just ask the parents of a child who has gone astray. No matter what they may have done right, their question is always “Where did we go wrong?” We blame ourselves when our perfect little babies don’t stay so perfect.

Monday, September 26, 2016

#RABlog Week Day 1: A Wedding, a Kayak and a Diagnosis

"RA Does Not Have to Define You" - Linda W. Perkins

Today is Day 1 of #RABlog Week and the topic is "Starting Stories." I've told my story several times here on Spring Sight and I wondered how I might tell it differently this time.

While I would never consider the diagnosis of a chronic, painful and incurable illness like rheumatoid arthritis to be amusing, there comes a point in your life when you have to find a way to laugh at even the worst of circumstances. After all, it's been said that laughter is good medicine for the soul, and I tend to agree.

So for today's post, I have created a title that's a take-off on the old "A Priest, a Rabbi and a Minister" joke. Yes, my starting story could be best described as "A Wedding, a Kayak and a Diagnosis." And fortunately for me, I was reminded by a fellow RA blogger's post that I have already told this story once before, in a multimedia format that's much more interesting than just a written story.

So without further ado, may I present "A Wedding, a Kayak and a Diagnosis" as told by me, and produced by Health Central. Read, listen and enjoy (spoiler alert: it has a good ending)!

My Story: A Wedding, a Kayak and a Diagnosis (link)

Check back here during the week for more RA-related posts, and go to the #RABlog Week topics page to find posts by other RA bloggers!

#RABlog Week Day 1: A Wedding, a Kayak and a Diagnosis originally appeared on Spring Sight blog, by Linda W. Perkins. Click here for more posts. Get even more encouragement by following me on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter. 

Many of Spring Sight's posts can also be found each week on Crystal Storms' #IntentionalTuesday,  Kelly Balarie's #RaRaLinkUp, Holly Barrett's Testimony Tuesday, Arabah Joy's Grace & Truth, Holley Gerth's Coffee for Your Heart, and Woman to Woman's Word Filled Wednesday. This week, I am also linking up with Jennifer Dukes Lee and Dawn at Journeys in Grace, as well as with Lori Schumaker.

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Monday, August 8, 2016

Finding Perfection in the Imperfect

How can a mere mortal presume to stand up to God?  How can an ordinary person pretend to be guiltless? Why, even the moon has its flaws, even the stars aren’t perfect in God’s eyes – Job 25:4-5

Two years ago, when I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, I would never have imagined myself saying the words that came out of my mouth last weekend.

“I am already living my dream, every day!”

I was standing in front of a table at a Christian writers conference, where an author and consultant was doing a prize drawing. All I had to do in order to enter was to write down my “big dream” on the paper covering the table.

I explained that I would have to think on it. As we chatted, I mentioned that I had several chronic illnesses, including RA. The consultant immediately jumped on it.

“Well, I’m sure that’s probably your big dream – to be healed!”

Even to my own surprise, I found myself replying, “Actually, no. That isn’t.”

If you’re a spoonie (someone who suffers from a chronic illness) like me, you’re probably sitting there with a look of disbelief on your face, as you read what I just wrote.

Monday, January 18, 2016

When Bad News is Good News

“We don’t know everything, but then we will, just as God completely understands us.” – 1 Corinthians 13:12b (CEV)

I stood up against the church door, propping it open with my foot, greeting people as they came and went from the worship center.

“Good morning!” I said in my most cheerful voice. “Have a great week!” I smiled as I shook a few hands.

As the sunlight streamed down onto my face, sharing its warmth on the cold wintry day, I took a moment to scratch the itchy rough place just above my eyebrow. Darn it! I thought. Still there. My hand reached up a little further to feel a spot on my forehead I had tried for a week not to touch, hoping that not picking at it would make it go away too. Nope. I guess I’ll have to ask about that one too.

It was Sunday, and just one day away from my dermatology appointment. The appointment was a follow up to the one I had six weeks before, where I had been given a cream that was supposed to clear up the red, scaly rash I had developed around my eyebrow. The ten days of treatment had come and gone. Six weeks later, the rough spot had temporarily cleared up but then returned. The spot on my forehead was new.

I examined my face Monday morning before leaving for the doctor’s office. Hmm. Sigh. Well, we will just see what she says, I thought.

An hour later, I was looking at what looked a little like a miniature version of a ray gun I had seen in the movie Star Wars. It wasn’t in the hands of an intergalactic warrior, however. It was in the hands of my dermatologist, who was preparing to use it on my face.

Six weeks beforehand, if my doctor had told me I had two precancerous growths on my face, I would have been concerned. I might have even been alarmed. My sister had said told me a couple months back that she was using a “chemo cream” on a place over her eyebrow, which in fact is what led me to get my own checked out. I didn’t want anything even remotely connected with the words “cancer” or “chemo.”

At this appointment, however, receiving the news that I had two AKs (an acronym for the hard-to-pronounce and even-harder-to-remember diagnosis of Actinic Keratoses) that needed to be removed via the mini-ray gun - er, cryosurgery – was a relief.

Don’t get me wrong; I would have much preferred it if the places on my face were just minor blemishes that could be fixed with a little acne medication or steroid cream. It’s just that the news of my precancerous lesions came after receiving the news of multiple friends with actual cancer.

Suddenly - in light of my friends' diagnoses - my diagnosis seemed like no big deal, in comparison. In fact, I felt grateful for the "bad news" my doctor had delivered. Unless I get an unexpected recurrence of these AKs, or unless more pop up, I’m done. My friends, on the other hand, are not. Nine weeks of chemo here. Six months there. Surgery. And, as I learned when my mother had cancer many years ago (and thankfully recovered from), you’re not considered “cured” until you hit the five-year remission mark.

All of this reminds me that how we deal with life’s ups and downs has much to do with perspective. 

At Christmastime, my daughter whined that Santa didn’t bring her a new iPhone or hoverboard like some of her friends received. Yesterday, I saw a photo of a Syrian child, not much younger than my own, who was literally starving in a refugee camp. Perspective, my child, perspective.

My Spring Sight blog audience is tiny compared to some other Christian bloggers. Yet, those same bloggers are writing and promoting theirs every day, while I am getting paid well to write elsewhere (aka, my “real” job) and have the privilege of spending most evenings and weekends with my family, rather than in front of the computer. Perspective, Linda, perspective.

I beat myself up often because of my struggle to lose the eight to ten pounds that keeps me in the slightly overweight versus healthy category of the weight charts. Then I see someone who, despite doctors and diets, has at least 50 pounds to go before they lose the “morbidly obese” label. To them, I’m already slim. Perspective. It’s all about perspective.

As my wise husband pointed out the other day to my daughter, an attitude of gratitude goes a long way. God cares about what we want, but He cares more about what we need. And perhaps the best way for us to appreciate all that we have, and even that which we don’t, is to look around.

Today, my bad news is good news. Very good news indeed.

How are you at keeping a positive perspective on life’s ups and downs? What do you struggle to be grateful for? Do you have a story to share of “bad news” that you then realized was actually good news?

When Bad News is Good News originally appeared on Spring Sight blog, by Linda W. Perkins. Click here for more posts. Get even more encouragement by following me on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter. 

Many of Spring Sight's posts can also be found each week on Grace Esedeke's EncourageMe Monday, Crystal Storms' #IntentionalTuesday,  Kelly Balarie's #RaRaLinkUp, Holly Barrett's Testimony Tuesday, Arabah Joy's Grace & Truth, Holley Gerth's Coffee for Your Heart,  and Woman to Woman's Word Filled Wednesday.


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